Farming Divisions

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Elat Farming & its newly formed subsidiaries is more than just a dream. It's an idea. It's a goal. It's a spiritual experience. The founders of Elat Farming (myself, Nick & Rodney) along with our chief investors (John & Siavash) have spent many days and many nights working on our project. The Elat Farming project is ongoing, and is continually expanding, and branching off into new directions. It began in my junior year of high school, at our "table" (soon to be a pic of), on the 3rd floor patio. Nick had a brilliant idea on how Rodney could save money on buying oranges (Rodney ALWAYS eats oranges for lunch). We could plant an orange seed, and make a tree, and then get the oranges! Free lunch for Rodney. It was a remarkable notion. Soon, we had planted our first orange seeds in the math quad. But why stop there...we planted apple seeds, carrots, watermelons, cucumbers, soon there was no more planting room in the math quad and we scouted the school, in search of more fertile soil. We found some outside of Ms. Malouf's room, and continued our planting. We found fertile soil in the vicinity of the business building, and in the front lawn... Soon, our seeds had been planted all over. Everyday, we would water (and sometimes even sing to) our seeds in the ground. Soon, our efforts began to pay off, as little plants began appearing, slowly popping out from under the soil to get some sun, and then they began to grow! One evil day however, the school gardeners maliciously destroyed our prime location in the math quad. It was a sad day for all of us. However, we still had nearly a dozen other locations to tend to. Unfortunately, we had winter break...and for too long a period of time, our plants did not get the water they needed. We returned to see most of our plants had died...and the damned gardeners had killed off most of the rest. It was this point when we realized that we could not risk putting all of our eggs in one basket, and that we had to diversify our investments in order to survive. So then, began our rapid expansion into topics such as: The Tony-Matin-Nahoom triple death match event, the Nahoom pissing incident, and Tony wrestling championships. We also began investing some of our time in the high school girl's soccer team, attending their home matches and offering our support. Elat Farming also began to think of its future web presence, which, after 2 years of delay, has now finally begun with the creation of this site. Elat Farming also now offers worldwide shipping of Matin's Persian rap recordings, as well as his thoroughly documented story at Jerry's Deli with the Black Muslim dude. Elat Farming has also made some divestures into movements such as: helping Nick become a legal U.S. citizen, so he stops getting deported to Mexico every other week, having Siavash's birth certificate altered to state his true place of birth, which is of course Inglewood, California. Elat Farming is also helping people such as John quit being such slutty whores, and become more professional street walkers. As you can see, Elat Farming truly has expanded from its original business operations. Now we are even expanding further, offering Dating Services, to lonely singles in the Los Angeles area, and hope to expand even further, to have our presence felt throughout the United States. On top of this, we are also going to launch our online store & and porn division, which should really make us rich! Although farming & harvesting remains the primary operation of the company, and we plan to soon add livestock to our portfolio, Elat Farming remains committed to doing whatever it takes to stay on top. One day, our competition at Elat Market will be doomed. Long live Pico Glatt!

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