Cheat Sheets
This is another well-known method. Often, people write notes on their hands/arms, or on little slips of paper. DON'T DO THIS. ALWAYS computerize your cheat sheet notes. No matter how well you write, a computer will always be able to write smaller, and more legibly. Dependant upon your vision, I recommend using Times New Roman font, size 6. If you can read smaller then that, go to size 5 or even 4, if you cant, go to size 7. Times New Roman font is useful because its small, compact, and readable at tiny font sizes. I suggest printing out multiple copies of your cheat notes at different font sizes, and then selecting the one which suites you best. Also, don't print out freaking index card size notes. You want to keep the size to a minimum, so it is more easily concealed from the teacher's view. If you have a large amount of notes, its a good idea to make them double sided, unless your cheating method does not permit it.
Here we have the SAME set of notes, all in Times New Roman font, but different sizes. Top left: size 6, top right: size 7, bottom: size 8. Clearly you can see how much of a difference size makes.
Ways to conceal cheat sheets are critical. Here are several methods I have successfully used over the years:
1) Putting them under your test papers. This one is pretty simple. Just hide your notes under the exam, and slide them out each time you need for viewing. Note: When doing this, DO NOT LOOK AT THE FUCKING TEACHER. This is a common mistake cheaters make. This gives you away totally. Act calm, cool, collected, look at your notes, go back to the test, don't ever look at the teacher during your exam, period.
2) Wear a hat. Have your notes taped to the inside of your cap, and take it off during the exam, unless your teacher has a habit of walking around the class, this works like a charm.
3) The water bottle method. Similar to using a hat, except you take a water bottle (or soft drink if its allowed, but water is usually better). Now this part takes some pre-class preparation. You use a razor to slice the outside wrapping, and insert your notes (faced in) under the wrapping, which you then cleverly glue/tape back to the plastic bottle. During your test, you drink water, and get to look at your notes while being refreshed! This is almost impossible to detect, but remember, don't freakin stare at your bottle for 30 minutes while you are drinking!
On the left, a perfectly normal looking bottle of cool refreshing Arrowhead mountain spring water. On the right, a close up look at something special inside. Now if only Arrowhead made bottles like that, they'd outsell Coke!
4) Jotting down notes on your desk. I cheated my way through math by putting certain equations which I couldn't remember on my desk. Put your arm and a calculator over them, and your set. Got through a lot of tests that way. Once your done taking the test, rub the pen or pencil off of the desk. This is much easier then rubbing them off of your arm. Hell, you could even bring in some Windex in an old bottle of visine. That gets the job done real fast. A little bit risky if you're new to cheating, but for professionals it's really simple.
5) Pocket notes. I would like to thank our friend Harrison for submitting the following, new and ingenious method of cheating. I haven't tried this personally but it sure sounds good. If you print up your cheat sheet in very small font this works very well. cut your cheat sheet into 2,3,4,5 or however many columns there are, then put a piece of tape on the back of it connecting all the pieces. this makes it so because they are in divisions so you can angle them best for you. Then use a shirt with a breast pocket, a looser shirt works better because this way if the pocket sticks out a little cause of the paper, it is not obvious there is something in the pocket. A tight shirt will make it look like you have one giant HUGE NIPPLE! You can also put money or things in there so if a teacher sees you glancing you can just pull out the money and say that you were just making sure the money was there. It works very well cause if you are looking down at the test, you just look in your pocket not very far from the test to see the cheat sheet. If the teacher walks by, just hit the cheat sheet and it folds down. This method works best with short things like vocabulary tests or formulas.
6) Other methods. A number of people have suggested to me a few clever alternatives on how to conceal very small cheat notes. Mostly, they include the pen/pencil trick that you may already be aware of. If you have a mechanical pencil that you can take the eraser off of, roll up your cheat notes and stick it in the little compartment where the extra lead goes, during the test, simply take them out and use. The same can be done with pens that have those clear grip things.
Advantages:
- Easy to use
- Applicable in multiple situations
- No reliance on other people needed
- Evidence can be eaten for easy escape
Disadvantages:
- Cheaters frequently give themselves away by looking at teacher
- If your vision sucks, you're screwed
- Well known method, teachers always on lookout for notes
