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THEY'RE BACK, AND THEY'RE BETTER THAN EVER!
Saturday, October 15, 2005
My goodness, I received an
email recently from a long retired pimp from many years ago.
The one and only CandyMan sends his regards to all the pimps
who continue with the daily struggle of finding some ho's to
slap around. Candy of course, being one of the founding
fathers of the warez scene, left before many of the new
pimps around here were even born, and so he commands respect
from us all.
Sunday, January 9, 2005
Well, a lot of the PiMPS have
gone to jail because the FBI and CIA hax0red them through
the anus. The rest have gone into deep hiding to avoid being
caught and deported to Sri Lanka. The only real update is
that Syren's profile has been modified to reflect his
illegal carding activities.
Thursday, December 11, 2003
My favorite IRC brotha, none
other than Vize is now an AOL-PiMP. I've known this guy ever
since his boat landed on the shores of America, and he is a
real pimp. He's been bitch slappin ho's and sluts silly
since he was a lil kid, so it's only natural that his
backhand talents be featured online as well.
Friday, August 29, 2003
A very deserving old school
hax0r, zuke, has joined the ranks here at AOL PiMPS.
He's been around the scene owning lamers and taking over
channels for years now, so it's only fitting that he should
get his props, as they are long overdue!
Thursday, August 21, 2003
Ok, I finally gave in. After
two and a half years of continual harassment
(see PiMP news from March 10,
2001 below), I have
decided that the time has come for syren to become an AOL
PiMP. I guess that this really does go to show how
persistence and annoyance can pay off.
[21:21] <syren> omg, how are
you gonna have them people on the site and not me
[21:21] <syren> will i ever be an aol pimp!@#?
[21:22] <syren> shit, i am an aol pimp/#macros hacker, AND I
AM IGNORED!
[21:22] <RajuAbju_> ahah, this is true. you shall be the
next pimp
[21:22] <syren> i heard that 4 years ago! then they stopped
the next day
[21:27] <syren> dont fuck with me on this! i will card your
life! and if i cant card it (which is impossible) I will
ROOTKIT YO!
[21:29] <RajuAbju_> ahah, yea
yea, your plight to become a pimp. ok i give in.
Sunday, August 17, 2003
I barely ever work
weekends... well, that's not true actually, but whatever.
The man who created scenenews, the brains behind the
operation, the guy who had the vision, the insight, and most
of all the guts, none other than reidar himself, has been
inducted into A0L-PiMPS today, congratulations my friend!
Wednesday, July 30, 2003
Very rare indeed is it for me
to update a PiMP profile, once it has been created and
approved. But today, such a thing has indeed occurred. I
last reported on PiMP Nuggz many moons ago, when he was just
a young lad. Well, now he is all grown up, and still ownin'
pussies left and right... If you know what I mean.
Wednesday, July 23, 2003
Ok, unfortunately, this is
not a joke. Our dear friend, Cable, a true pimp of AOL, and
long time member of the scene, passed away recently. Visit
his memorial site at:
www.craigmay.com
Friday, June 6, 2003
This one has been a long time
coming. Dynamic is someone everyone knows, and pretty much
no one likes. Although he is rather modest, and was at first
hesitant to accept such a prestigious award as becoming an
AOL PiMP, I felt he is truly deserving. I think he is just
too damn ereet for us common folk, and this is probably
true. Dynamic is definitely one of a kind, and that's
probably a good thing.
Monday, April 28, 2003
One of the all time greats,
the one, the only, trex, has become an AOL-PiMP today. He
didn't ask for this special award, and, probably didn't want
it, and maybe he wont even accept it, but too fucking bad.
Congratulations hax0r!
Friday, February 28, 2003
Very exciting news folks,
very exciting news. Kasino, Rage, Reflux have all been added
to the pimp wall of shame. Show them your support, they need
it. I have plans to add even MORE pimps in March. But for
now, this is all you fucking get. Congrats to rage for
getting the recognition he deserves after almost exactly 2
years of continual harassment to join AOL PiMPS
(see PiMP news from March 19,
2001, below).
Friday, February 21, 2003
Yes, just when you were
beginning to think there were no more pimps on AOL, I have
found one anew. Buci, better known and juicy buci, has
joined the club of immortals. Let's all congratulate him for
all the useless accomplishments he had achieved throughout
the years to finally be recognized as a worthy PiMP on this
page of nothingness.
Tuesday, August 6, 2002
Today, someone TRULY
deserving to be pimporized has finally gotten the
recognition he deserves. I am very proud to announce that
APP, perhaps among the most annoying people ever to exist on
the aol scene, has gotten his star on the aol walk of shame.
Congratulations bro, and its good to see you are back once
again amongst your people.
Thursday, July 18, 2002
After some relative
unpimpiness, I have returned to work on these bloody
bastards today. We have a new, secret agent pimp...Trystar!
Welcome to the land of immortals, where the pimps run free
and naked.
Friday, April 19,
2002
OMG, I'm on a fucking roll
here.... I added another two pimps this evening, welcome ob1
and nuggz to our hall of shame. In unrelated news, I would
like to say hello to my truly elite hax0r buddy BUSta! Damn
bro, I haven't talked to you in like 3 years, I'm glad you
found this webpage, and decided to email me... :)
Sunday, April 14, 2002
Due to the unending clamoring
about new pimps, I have added three more deserving losers to
the list of immortal hax0rs of the world. Yay for holly, our
first female pimptress, sqwert, the whiny little cocksucker
pimp, and FGCUSabre, the uhmmm 3rd pimp I added.
Thursday, March 21, 2002
Oh my god. Something I
thought would never happen. NEW PIMPS have actually been
added to this site. People have been BEGGING me for some
sort of update, any update at all... I simply cannot ignore
the demand to congratulate individual persons of no
accomplishment by pimporizing them here for all eternity.
New pimps for now are Jist, Chip, and esco. I may even be
adding more later!!!
Saturday, December 8, 2001
I know everyone was scared
for a few weeks, that the PiMPS, along with the rest of my
site were gone forever, but do not fear! The PiMPS are back
online!
Wednesday, June 30, 2001
I'm such a nice guy. I even
alphabetized the PiMPs list for everyone's convenience!
Wednesday, May 16, 2001
Well, after I quit working on
SceneNews.com because Outlawsys was a control freak and
didn't allow me to "express" myself the way I wished, I
removed all the work I had done on the page, including
A0L-PiMPs. I waited for the new webmaster to recreate this,
or something similar, but I guess it's not going to be done,
and when I tried to inquire whether or not there were any
future plans to bring back A0L-PiMPs, I got no response.
Since I think its hilarious, and I spent all this time
working on it, and chaos has originally given ME permission
to create the second installment of A0L-PiMPs, I've decided
to put the PiMPs up on my own page, for public display and
humiliation. I have no immediate plans to create new PiMPs,
as I no longer spend much time on IRC; however, if there are
individuals who wish to PiMPoRiZe people they see worthy of
such title, I am fully open to letting others do so, and I
will gladly plaster the PiMPs up on this site!
Thursday, March 29, 2001
Here's an email I
received from cowboy aka John, the famous creator of
Raju's Sheep.
Obviously, I
have no choice but to oblige, and PiMPORiZE cowboy in the
very near future.
Raju, I am surprised you have
not made me an aol pimp yet considering what i made about
your sheep fetish. As you can see i am at work now. I just
moved so i have been very bored which allowed me time to
work on rajussheep 2: raju strikes back. It is done except
for the little preview i want to make cause i want to make
people wait and build up excitement for this sequel to
rajussheep. As soon as that is done i will start work on
Rajussheep 3:Return of the Raju. Also how is your wife? You
know your blow up doll sheep? The wedding photo you donated
to Rajussheep 2 was very kind >:-)
John Dempsey
Monday, March 19, 2001
People CONTINUE to beg
and msg and IM and plead with me to add them to AOL-PiMPS,
as if it's some sort of lifetime achievement hall of shame,
er fame. It's one thing for a homosexual such as syren to be
begging me (see below)
but now, random hoe's
such as rage, who aren't even worth my time to talk to want
to be PiMPS? I think not. Anyhow, I DO plan to add WORTHY
new PiMPS within the next week or two, so come back often.
[13:06] <rage`> damnit raju
[13:06] <rage`> when am i going to be on aolpimps!
[13:07] <rage`> im gonna send
foot and mouth disease to your flock of sheep
[13:07] <rage`> unless im made an aol pimp SOON!
[13:16] <RajuAbju> rage, you
will never be an aol pimp, you are worthless
[13:17] * rage` curses rajus
sheep with food and moith disease!
Thursday, March 15, 2001
I think fiero aka brian is
pissed about his pimp profile. I received this fascinating
email from him earlier today:
"I just have a quick question
here Mr. AOL'r. On your site, you have a copyright
statement that I am going to quote here; "This Page Last
Updated: 03.13.01 . 1996-2001 Scene News. All Rights
Reserved" Um, buddy. Scenenews wasn't around in 1996.
What crack are you smoking? If I am not mistaken, it wasn't
formed untill late 1998 by bryan, and was scenenews.net at
that. Sad how you make fun of people, but are lame yourself
in trying to make it out like you've been around for quite
some time. I don't even remember your lame ass in 1996,
that's even worse.
Anyway, I think your page of
me on scenenews.com is kinda funny. I love how you say
how we all have pitiful meaningless lives, yet, you're a
stupid teenager, who sits in front of his computer alllll
fucking day, and lives and dies by AOL warez. I think
you need to stop and look in the mirror buddy.
The thing is, I know what's going through your head at this
moment too, "You're on IRC all the time too, brian" Which,
is correct Mr AOL'r. My screen may be connected 95% of
the time, but I think I may spend about 1-2 days total, as I
have a job, a girlfriend, and a life outside of computers as
well. So don't even try to rebuttle with me, "you're
on your computer 24/7/365", because that's incoherantly
false information. Anyway, you guys are pretty pathetic.
I can only suggest growing up, but you may find that hard.
Take care you poor little teenagers! =)"
Ok, so he was right about the
1996-2001 thing, I fixed that. Thanks for taking the time
and pointing that out brian!
Saturday, March 10, 2001
New PiMPS
have been added! Pimps from #macros, and the deadly MOBsters!
As well as an all time favorite, viowatch! Enjoy. Oh yea, I
previously had reported that both coz and deep were dead or
missing in action or something; I would to correct
that...coz is alive and well, only deep is a gayass lazy bum
whore.
Look at some
of the pathetic groveling people msg me with, in their lame
attempts to convince me that they too, deserve to be
PiMP0RiZED... I've gotten dozens of msgs like this in the
past few days. You all really have no lives. Seriously.
<syren_> i wanna be an aol
pimp!!
<syren_> i deserve to be up
there instead of some of them
<syren_> i've been aroun longer!
<RajuAbju> it cant be stupid
<syren_> i think you just
dont like me
<syren_> i see how it is
<syren_> i'm gonna go cry
<RajuAbju> thats goin on aol
pimps too
Thursday, March 1, 2001
Well, the first set of new
PLATINUM PiMPS have been added! Our deepest condolences go
out to all of them. It took many hard days of hax0ring a0l
to gain the skillz and knowledge that these special people
have obtained. Because it seem's both coz and deep have
either been deported to Mexico, or joined storm in hiding
from the FBI, I now am looking for new people with no lives
to help seek out and identify new PiMPS, and to tell the
rest of the world about their worthless lives. If you are
such a person, please find me somehow and offer me your body
& money, err help and time. Oh yea, and although many of you
are these worthless and lifeless people, no, you cannot
PiMP0RiZE yourself. So stop asking if you can submit a PiMP
profile of your own pathetic self.
<RajuAbju> you don't think
chaos will mind my hax0rizing that pic do u?
<RaSH> probably
<deep> he said u had to say he died in a boating accident
and was eaten by barracudas
<deep> and then we could use whatever we wanted
<deep> and something about ninjas
<deep> you have to mention
his Jewish roommate glen
<deep> and how glen fell off his bike and broke his ankle
<deep> trying to run away from a flamingo
<RajuAbju> cool
Wednesday, February 21, 2001
The notorious and infamous
hax0rizer ^chaos^ was found dead last week by the US Coast
Guard, a few miles off the coast of Florida. Chaos was
apparently traveling to Cuba to be reunited with his secret
lover Elian Gonzalez, and his long time "personal friend",
Fidel, after breaking up with his Jewish roommate, Glen.
Glen broke his ankle after falling off his bike while
fleeing from a stampeding herd of wild flamingo's and was no
longer able to put out, so chaos took it upon himself to end
the relationship. According to the Coast Guard, chaos was
eaten by a school of barracudas after elite ninjas cut holes
in the rubber ducky he was riding to Cuba. The new AoL Pimps
Platinum Edition is dedicated to the memory of the notorious
AOL HaX0r chaos. On a related note, a FBI Public Relations
official released a statement saying they were pleased to be
informed of this incident as now AOL is a much safer placer
without the presence of chaos lurking about in the
"Male4Male" and "GayTeenLove" chat rooms.
Well, our poor, beloved chaos, of AOL-PiMPS fame, such a horrid fate fell upon him indeed. However, we shall NOT let his legend of the AOL-PIMPS die! NO! We shall continue the struggle in identifying new PIMPS around the scene. We shall continue the legacy of the man, once known as chaos, a true AOL PIMP, and many thanks go to deep and coz, for helping me out!
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PiMPS:
App
Buci
Cable
Chip
Clonr
Cowboy
Crimson
Dubie
Dynamic
Esco
Evil
FGCUSabre
Fiero
Forbin
Goldilow
Holly
Jist
Kasino
Kiss
Nuggz
ob1
Outlawsys
Paul
Rage
Reflux
Reidar
Rigger
Ruthian
Seth
Sqwert
Stone
Storm
Syren
Toxin
Trex
Trystar
Viowatch
Vize
Zuke
#Mob
#Macros
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